Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
I just had to have my mom look at my penis to figure out what it was. How do you think my day is going?
I swear that men would be more efficient if they had a semen gauge on their penises
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
Apparently the library doesn't care about celebrating the day Jesus became a zombie.
Thank god for makeup because it looks like someone took a shit on my face
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
She's passed out laying in the middle of the street. Cars are honking at her and going around her body. We need to stop playing BONECRUSHER.
She said it was unconventional for me to yell "Shazam!!" when I came inside her.
Blowing a married man is so much more important than a 12 year olds basketball game.
I don't know whether to be insulted or flattered that I am being propositioned to have a threesome only if I wear my cat onesie
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
Besides, I'm booked tomorrow. I'm planning on drinking heavily and crying in the bath.
First walk of shame in 18 years. Divorce is going well.
Randomize