The first thing on our $10,000 damage bill was "condoms in the main drain"
I totally ignored my nose and drank sour milk this morning. The tupid carton said 4/22/09. i puked everywhere..
apparently i broke a 100 dollar bill to tip the bartender on a free drink
I woke up this morning and thought "Im sure I've seen this house in a porno" and instantly googlemapped myself
He came in the heat vent in my car. Don't ask how it happened.
what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
I wanna get so drunk next week I throw up on a guy's genitals. I want to be that memorable for someone.
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
I feel wrong giving my mom a cash gift full of dirty stripper money.
You were pretty dunk by the time you introduced the vase as your best friend.
I hit on her. So did Sarah. Neither of us got anywhere. I swear she's asexual. Like Switzerland.
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
Randomize
