its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
Dude i have a 6th sense for when bagel bites are ready.
i think i left my bra at your place
It's still hanging from my ceiling fan. Please let me keep it there.
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
Currently microwaving whipped cream to make white Russians and hotboxing the kitchen while this random kid is dancing in the corner.
that freshman chick we always see on the weekends walked into art class wearing a jaegermeister shirt and holding a monster, which she proceeded to shotgun with a pair of scissors. It sickens me to know I will never achieve her level
You just kept shouting "I AM AN ADULT!" until he agreed to carry you home on his shoulders.
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
I'm in public and Taylor Swift is playing. It is taking all my effort to not screech like a goat.
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
Quick question, did I crash teeth with you when I snogged you, or did I headbutt something between the car and the bed last night?
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
Randomize
