he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
Just got caught pissing on a plant in her room while she was in the shower first word out of my mouth were my bad
she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
I got a job at a micro-brewery. Now who made the bigger mistake, them or me?
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
I've hooked up with three guys in my accounting class. I'm beginning to think my teacher failed me so I can start getting laid again.
You kicked in the door when she was blowing him. You dont remember do you?
I was so proud to be driving sober that I wanted to get pulled over so I could tell the officer I hadn't been drinking.
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
Also, did you really start discussing the weather in the middle of telling you my sexual fantasy about you?
He took a picture of me to show his boss why he was late...Is that a compliment or not?
He somehow always manages to get me naked within 5 minutes of being together. It's like fucking witchcraft.
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
Somehow I don't think offering me edibles is what dad meant by checking in on me
They're the hard candy kind!
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