I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
If im paying 4grand for laser eye surgery, it better help with beer goggles cuz last night was pretty rough.
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
I hope there's a soldier with a Bedazzler just going to town right now.
second attempt at shower sex: failed after the water turned orange bc of a fire up the street. this is just not meant to be
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
My professor just told me I'm living a lie and I found puke on my pants. How do you think it's going?
Oh ya, I forgot to tell you, last night I woke up to the sound of you peeing on the floor next to the fridge, didn't remember until now. Have fun at Dayton!
I might have pissed in the corner of someone's shed. They have nice lawn mower.
Dude! We had to write our address on your arm in permanent marker so you wouldn't get lost. You just showed the cabbie your arm and he drove you! Nice guy.
I am sitting in my lingerie, eating frozen cookie dough out of a bowl, and watching family. My hump day is going great
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
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