haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
I thought if I stared at him long enough he'd walk me to my car. but he didn't. he dddidn't. i rreally thought i had those powers.
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
she takes plan B like it's going out of style
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
Why do you keep getting laid in MY dreams
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
That makes 14 Xmas cards already! Middle aged people are really nice to their dealers.
For breaking and entering. I think neighbor dan cared more about me puking in his backseat than the surprise of me waking up there
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
How does the curb feel today?
It's stronger than my elbow. But I found my lighter while I was down there.
If sleeping with your boss doesnt scream job security i dont know what does.
Randomize