just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
You're not drunk til you wake your roommates up screaming at your ceiling fan
Diet Starts Tomorrow! Guy from McDonalds asked if I got a new car...
I'm watching Pretty Woman alone and weaving a basket for Fiona. This is my life.
Some guy Just sang about my ass on the street
It was terrible lyrics but I would have thrown my life savings into that guitar case if I had any.
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.
Currently watching high school football on ESPN. Drink every time they say 'this kid's got potential' or 'look at this kid go' or 'atta kid' We're done for..
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
He told me my car had really nice leather seats right before he jizzed all over them.
Randomize
