the only thing i have to deal with now is the fact that i'm still wearing spandex shorts from last night
Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
we made a giant pot of alcholic jello. i filled a gallon bag and brought it to dorms. desk guy gave me weird looks, he doesnt realize this is how i will pass all of my room searches
something had to give and with her weight the coffee table never stood a chance
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
He realized that I was watching deadliest catch while we were jerkin off on FaceTime.
All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship.
I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
I was so drunk last night I asked a rando at the bar to take a picture with me cause I thought he was in the band
lost my vibrator and now I have to masturbate manually. The struggle is fucking real.
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
The dude we met that gave us weed sent me a video of his balls covering the sun like a solar eclipse
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
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