Yeah, but I'm out of licorice and there's no way anywhere near here will rent us all mopeds on a Tuesday night.
Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
I understand why you refuse to be sober now
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
How do you feel?
Like the devil himself shit me out, baked me into a pie, ate the pie, and shit me out again.
I don't like getting sloppy drunk but I don't like getting just half drunk either, I'm way too responsible if my blood alcohol level is below 0.2
I think I broke my hip playing drunk ping pong
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
Aaaaand my mom is wearing jeggings...
I never thought I'd end up with a prison pen pal through tinder
WHY ARE THE COPS ALWAYS AT DENNYS WHEN IMDRUNK!?
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
Randomize
