What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
a dead guy is trying to sell me oxy clean on my tv
You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
He just ordered a bottle of Beam at an Italian place for us to share.
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
I had to stop mid sex to take my turn on words with friends so he wouldn't get suspicious. Hookup of the night helped me. We won.
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
I have a meeting at work in an hour, I'm so hungover going outside is NOT happening there are roads and shit I'll totally get myself killed.
I hate him and his pretentious your-sleeping-in-the-wet-spot look.
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
I solemnly swear I will not get your boyfriend puke in public drunk again
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
All I did was call him a fucker when he took my pot. He didn't have to arrest me.
It’s like my vagina just knows when a man is a barrel-chested freedom fighter.
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
Randomize
