I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
woke up with the bag of wine duct taped to my shoulder.
There was a stripper pole on the party bus. Was being past tense because some fat chick somehow tore it from the ceiling while grinding
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
I feel like my chances would have been better if I hadn't told her "I need to fuck you before you leave."
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
She pushed me over. She offered me a shot from her tits. We're good now
I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.
Do you remember peeing in the sink while I was throwing up?
No ma'am, I do not. I found a video of us trying to do a trust fall though. Emphasis on the trying.
Is "I am going to murder you if you keep sending me requests that I cannot fulfill" unprofesh?
Ah, drunk me ordered sushi at 3 a.m. for sober me's lunch the next day. EXCELLENT
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
I need to find a more reliable booty-call so I can start dating people and take it slow.
Randomize
