Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
franzia sundays are my new favorite holiday
I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.
oh ps. last night you kept telling me to calm down because everything was fine cause you were getting "arab money"...
God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
She told me I should be a condom model.
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
At this point all my Tinder matches are telling me I'll be fucking the whole male population of UMass '17.
It was one of those mornings when I wake up and feel like I have to say sorry to the whole world
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
Did I ever tell you what happened that night after he ran you over?
Good morning beautiful! Wanna steal a cat this weekend?
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