He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
She swallowed my jizz and then took a shot of jack daniels and said "chaser." This cant be real life.
Hunting for men at chipotle... I feel like I should be more disappointed that this is the way my life is going but I'm really just excited for the potential.
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
I told him id do anything with him and he said angry pirate? So I said okay. Never seeing him again.
What's an angry pirate?
You dont want to know. If someone offers say no. Never ever do the angry pirate. Ever.
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
I just remembered I did the whole byebyebye dance at the bar
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
i think the people from taco bell are onto us. they had my order ready today at 3am BEFORE I even got there.
I had to put my dog down, accidentally outed my brother, and was given a fucking fish sandwich instead of a Big Mac ALL IN ONE DAY! Am I really the person you want to consult for advice? Hhhmmmmmm?
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
sometimes i forget what nice tits i have and then i spend a month brushing my teeth naked in the front of the bathroom mirror, and i remember.
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
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