How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
So I fucked that hot french guy last night
You do know he's the one who threw up on our table, right? You get to clean it up.
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
Did I happen to mention where i left my keys when I drunk dialed you last night
my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor.
Did I send you a naked snap the other day with a fat blunt in my mouth with the caption "$1200 bitches!" ?
Apparently my thong was thrown in the cornfield last night. No one will tell me why.
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
Took my plan b at Costco today, sample Sunday for the win.
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
What's the best way to tell a guy he can call me when his impending divorce is finalized?
Got baked and laid and ate baked lays when I laid down while baking the brownies I I’m Superman
You’re still high, aren’t you?
Oh yeah
Randomize
