hotel room ftw
It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
I hate fucking guys that don't drink coffee. My morning hangover and shame will not be cured by your stupid tea.
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
I can't be the first person ever who had to explain why her bottle of orange juice had a picture of a screwdriver drawn on it
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
Woke up in a pile of people on the floor. His dad was already up and ask me to help him cook bacon because "7 lbs can be a mother fucker"
I either need to get adopted or have someone's baby, but I'm joining that family
You should probably stop your little brother from ruining thanksgiving. I just caught him trying to stuff a cake in a drawer... And now he's puking.
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
I was playing 'If You Had To Fuck One or Die' with the old composite pictures with a guy in the bathroom line. They were all pretty ugly so I go "You can tell this is a lower tier frat"......turns out the guy was a brother
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
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