he told me i looked like an animal then proceeded to kiss me
she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
this homeless guy just told me to make a wish on his magic plastic spoon but said to be careful what i wish for...
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
Just saw a dude hanging out a window upside down chugging a 60 of vodka. This weekend is big for everyone I guess
She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America.
Drunk me forgot I'm not an 18yr old raver anymore. Adult me is now in pain.
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
I forgot what I was gonna say, but I'm pretty excited to not be pregnant.
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
you bounced a quarter off my butt and it came back hitting you in the eye. karma, bitch.
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