brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
Are you for fucking real.? He divorced me just because he got a fucking girlfriend.?!
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
When she gives birth, I'm so playing 'Eye of the Tiger'
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
It's not like I'm never gonna put out again. I'm a sure thing. I promise.
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
Listen I'm a sentimental character under all this alcohol and ratchetry
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
guy next to me on the train just pulled out two bottles of gin and a block of cheddar. is slowly making his way through all of them.
Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
The holidays are too long. I always run out of adderall before I run out of family. you got any left?
The best thing about this time of year is that all I have to do is add a random mardi gras decoration to my cart full of alcohol and boom, no more judging
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
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