So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
I'm currently googling how to make a dress out of a trash bag. It's going to be a great night.
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
she kept yelling about wanting tacos, so I gave her a piece of bologna in a tortilla. she didn't know the difference
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
Apparently "I licked it so now it's mine" doesn't apply to people
My dad lost his bandaid somewhere in the turkey. It was a mixture of thanksgiving and an Easter egg hunt
It's like the drive of shame on fucking Christmas. Happy birthday Jesus
I made an executive decision to rename my Resume file to something other than MONEYMONEYMONEY.
She tried to fuck me right at the bar in front of everyone. She actually got my pants unzipped before I realized what was going on.
Randomize
