i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
Just heard a guy discussing with someone else the amazing blow job you gave him. I’m in New York. Over 2 hours away from where you live. I have never been more proud.
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
i think the date started going downhill when i mentioned how many therapists i have
I'd like to personally thank you for not letting anyone puke in any of the salad bowls this time
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
Every single person in NY is either baking, drinking, or photographing their cat. Reporting live from Instagram.
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
Did you really get 12 corn dogs from the gas station last night?
Things I Learned Tonight: I have no future in goat wrangling. Herding. Whatever you call the ridiculosity that just transpired.
I think I'm destined to be the stoner version of one of those successful but emotionally unavailable characters Sandra Bullock always plays in movies
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
DUDE I FINGERED JOE'S MOM, PLS DONT TELL HIM, MORE LATER
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