No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
He snuck into some random hotel's continental breakfast at 3 AM and then passed out on a bench in the lobby. When the cops found him they made him empty out his pockets. No phone, no ID just muffins.
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
Yeah! I was just fired because there was an over hire and the new girl is hotter than me. Seeing as how the new girl is my baby sister I think punching my manager is excusable.
I had sex for the second time today and ate an entire bag of alligator jerky on the way home. These truly are the golden years.
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
If you're funny as hell and have a mustache, odds are I'm probably gonna fuck you
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
I'm kinda glad you won't be in Vegas tomorrow because you'd make us go streaking or throw dead animals at them.
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
Randomize
