Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
the only good thing about him lasting five minutes was that nobody thinks i had sex with him or that im a slut because we were only in the bathroom for five minutes
Just found a ramen cup in the stall and all of the showers running with no one in them. WHERE ARE YOU?
He just broke up w his most recent gf again, wish I could message her and be like it's not you he's gay.
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
So last night I learned something new. Whenever I drink beer out of a bottle a random guy buys me another one. It was like as soon as the glass hit my lips every guy in a 20ft radius got a hard on.
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
Wait. Wine + Crossbow..?
I'm trying to make sure he doesn't drown in the toilet. Because I'm a nice lady.
Actually new year, new me. I haven’t had sex yet so technically I’ve been a virgin all year.
Did u find my other sock in your bra? U said u were uneven so I did the gentlemanly thing.
Randomize
