have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
I passed out in the cab. Woke up to the cabby yelling SIR SIR WE ARE AT THE TRAIN STATION!! SIRRRR!!
they could make at least 3 episode of "i shouldn't be alive" out of my weekend
You must have had one hell of a time explaining to that girl why aladin soundtrack was playing on repeat in your room when you got back
from now on when you get up to pee in the middle of the night, check to see if im sleeping in your parking lot.
i do.
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
Omg considering I am covered in cake and probably cocaine that is the greatest news I have ever heard
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
If I come in tomorrow with a cane and a seeing eye dog it's because I just mixed up my salicylic acid acne stuff with my eye makeup remover
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
I just found your shirt hanging in a tree 4 blocks from the party...in the opposite direction of your house. where are you going?
Answered a bio test question bc of watching phineas and ferb. Remind me to always drink when studying.
idk but im stoned n hiding in the bathroom from my kids with a really big bowl of really little candy bars
Randomize
