Who would have thought the night we were surrounded by 4 cops would be the most responsible night of the week.
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
I looked up while we were having sex to see him covering my pillow pet's eyes with his free hand. I think I'm in love
From scraping the remnants from a coke bag at a lingerie party to meeting with an 80 year old man to discuss civil rights all in under 12 hours bizarrely feels like the epitome of my life
So apparently I ended up throwing my clothes in the toilet after getting kicked out of TQ and ran around the neighborhood in my boxers. Works gonna suck hard once this hangover kicks in. Also: I lost a shoe so looks like flipflops for the rest of winter
I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game.
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
After I came she just held my balls until I fell asleep. It was like adult swaddling. Magical...
Woke up on my sisters couch, and it was like the start of a Terminator movie,my brother in law was passed out on the floor naked in the fetal position. We now call him Arnold. It was an epic night.
Don't mind me, I'm just walking 2 miles across campus with no jacket, covered in highlighter, and carrying a hair extension. Gotta love miami!
Ever had one of those went so hard last night you woke up at the foot of the bed naked wondering where your phone ended up?
Randomize
