Weirdest conversation with my dad. He just told me he didn't shave his pubes.
And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
its official. the only way for my hair to look good is to blow somebody
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
I wish university was like frosh week all the time and then they just give you a degree for surviving
One does not fall in love, one falls flat on the their face after leaving a bar
Just got a motivational speech from the tacobell drive thru guy at 2am
Just had a reminder come up that just said "Ham"
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
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