The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
i knew it was love when she pulled a beer out from between her boobs and offered it to me
Chicks before dicks must only mean American dicks
I'm spending tomorrow doing taxes and making jello shots. Is this adulthood?
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
I'm just saying, if you haven't been dropped off at a Wawa at 5:30 in the morning by 3 cop cars, you're missing out
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
What do I have to do?! Spell it out for him? Why can't he just plow me and pull my hair at the same time
You are my new hero
There's a random table in the kitchen...and it's not the kitchen table...we don't know where it came from
Also: that bruise on my leg where you left like 3 sets of teeth marks keeps getting run into the corners of desks and shit. And I can't even complain to anyone at work
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
Randomize
