i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
He was drinking a long island through his Breathalyzer tube.
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
I totally left my shirt at your house. Also I think I high fived your cactus last night
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
I swear, the cow we tried to tip tried to eat me. and all I could think was, oh how the tables have turned. worst trip ever
Grilled cheese and shark week. Unemployment done right.
Just tried to do a line with a snorkel I cut off... that is how my Aruba trip is going!
B. I found a note on my phone and all it says is 'Fuck yeah im a racecar'
Then, even the devil himself would be scared of us. And we'd be bestfriends with Jesus. He would love us.
We're so high we're eating flavored lube.
Randomize
