Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
i just wanna soil my oats bro
fuck, i never want to drink again I drunk dialed matt last night and broke up with him the second night in a row. FUCK QUADFEST
the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
There is a chick wearing some guy's shirt wrapped around her waist as a skirt... She's flashing her panties to everyone as she sings karaoke. You need to get here.
After you puked in the bathtub you claimed you were never eating quesadillas again and you never even ate a quesadilla
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
I think I should've done my makeup before I took the acid. Because now I just feel silly looking at myself in the mirror
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
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