All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
Let me just say....i'm sorry about setting your carpet on fire. I had no idea that the paper towel would burn that quickly.
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
This number has temporarily been disconnected and will be restored to service once you get rid of you girlfriend.
When he was fat he reminded me of my high school best friend and I just wanted to hug him and hug him. Also, he's funny and humor is the fastest way into my pants after Doctor Who and liquor.
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
So hungover that I might just sit in my car and wait until chipotle opens...in two hours...
I rewired his car so that every time he hits the gas the horn and the OnStar turn on every time he hits the brake the panic alarm goes off.
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
Randomize
