is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
I would just like you to know that the guy I blew off last weekend to come find ur drunk ass just got drafted into the major leagues.
Moment of silence for the loss of that option.
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
He's like a Lana del Rey song that took human form
Dicks are not precious.
I never thought my gollum impression would lead to me getting laid.
Huzzah!
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
All I know is I woke up in the back seat of my car, with the engine on, and my gps navigated to florida.
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
Randomize
