No, asshole. I'm not gay. But if I was I think I would do better than fucking Nick Lachey.
He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
I miss seeing your mom and dad at church, well mostly just your mom... She used to hug my face into her boobs.
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
he was gone before i woke up. left a pee stain, phone number, note and $20 for sheets. safe to say i will not be calling.
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
Just found a condom on my floor from last weekend. 2/2. The scavenger hunt is over.
Goldenshlager is a hell of a drink. And these are the adventures ur missing out on w me. I gave someone a bath Emily. A BATH.
Awkward
Can't say I wouldn't let it happen again.
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
Randomize