Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
last night you decided it was time to "get organized" and "straighten out your life." You pulled out a bag of troll dolls, sorted through them and got nostalgic. You demanded both andy and i take one and keep it forever.
a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
I wiped a tear off her cheek with my boner. It cheered her up
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
We just licked a sour creme and onion chip for salt for a tequila shot. Our vacation has officially begun.
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
Did you pluck my eyebrows one night when I passed out?
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
Laying on my kitchen floor and the lights just got brighter... I just died or there was a power surge. Based on the amount of booze I drink both are possible.
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
I fucked a French man last night. 5 Times. Ashed my cig in his cactus. That later set on fire while we were having sex.
Randomize
