I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
She just messaged me 19 sad faces.
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
hold on, were in the kitchen painting a yellow brick road to my vagina on my leg with black light paint.
Just so we're clear. I'm still making jello shots and bringing them to the bar in my purse. I don't care if its half off margaritas. Don't want anyone thirsty
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
Alright, deal. Settling two drug deals before noon is what I call a productive day. I'm not even gonna go to math, I've practiced enough numbers for the day.
How can I politely yet provocatively ask you for a cock shot?
I've made a single handle of rum last like three weeks and my mom hasn't even acknowledged it.
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
Guess who has two thumbs and broke her boyfriends dick?
I did just chug a pint glass of wine during a solid round of masterbation, so I believe I am ready for bingo.
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
Hey. I hope you have enough room in your car for me and a Honda civic front bumper.
That's the 3rd negative pregnancy test this month. I'm on a roll.
Randomize
