he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
I want to get so drunk, you will need subtitles to understand me. Rough week.
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
He better not be in your backpack
Even when you're down just know that I will always be the one to pour alcohol into your asshole when you're on probation
Hey, I'm off work. Wanna take a metric fuckton of adderall, possibly get daydrunk, and get my hair cut?
For the record, rock bottom is where you start crying during porn because your ex used to slap your ass like that.. Continue on with your day now.
It's 2:10 am I am sprawled on the floor of the kitchen drunk and eating cold chicken wings come help
My purse is like an anchor I can't move I am sliding around like an over turned turtle send help
This floor is really dirty send a maid if you can
Who knew that the guy I fucked on your front lawn during welcome week freshman year would turn out to be my husband
They made me leave the maternity ward, how do I get back in?
Walked off the dance floor to find Gabe hitting on a dad bod at the bar. It was my Dad. Awkward is an understatement.
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