Thanks for the three minutes of sex tonight.
remember when you found twisted pleasure condoms in my parents bathroom? theyre gone.
Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
He yelled "HERE COMES THE WARMTH" before he pissed his pants. In front of the whole party.
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
NoShamevember. You game?
I feel like our lives always have been and always will be a never ending drunken rampage full of pregnancy scares and lost brain cells
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
I love you. Go after that dick
I'm not sure. I have to find the Greeks I was with last night and see if they can explain to me why I can't hear out of my right ear and why I look like I got the shit kicked out of me
You crawled into bed with Bob and started whispering to him about produce.
Dude I just woke up naked on the floor with my dick in a boot. Legit in a fucking boot. I also have no idea where I am.
Also you think METH is on the same level of wanting to see the movie cats? We’re gonna unpack that later
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
Randomize
