He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
i decided i am going on the Justin Bobby plan for success. Don't cut my hair for a year, don't shave for a month, land Audrina Patridge. Game on.
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
I still think it's messed up that you're naming your kids after all the guys you slept with in college
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
He tried to stick it in and I asked him what he wanted to name our child and he quit.
Whoever put the picture of my dad in the condom box is an asshole
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
I have a new philosophy. Fuck wearing bras, it's summertime.
I'm pretty sure your ex of four years just had a baby with some kid and named it after you...
I got wing sauce on the baby and licked it off. If you were wondering how I'm doing.
Last time I was blackout at Cowbells I was running around screaming “WHERES THE BLOOOWWWW”
I have a mild substance abuse problem, but I'm still a functioning member of society. America.
Put my boyfriend in a chastity cage while he was passed out last night. Now I control his orgasms.
Randomize
