Getting fucked up met up rando with a girl I confesswed my love for last night. weird, going with it
And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
I just put my retainer in and it tastes like weed
Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
This house was built for laser tag.
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
We FINALLY fucked. I swear that's the longest I've ever held out for
Umm you met him three days ago....
I said what I said
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
He sent me a picture of Reese's peanut butter cups next to his dick. Of course I went over.
So, then you thought it was a good idea to dress up like the Hamburglar, buy a bag full of McDonalds hamburgers, go to Burger King and throw them at everyone while screaming "HAMBURGLAR!". At that point there was no stopping you.
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
Randomize
