it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
we saw you sitting at the door of the dorm trashed, wrapped in DANGER tape with a stolen balloon around your wrist
he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
She answered the door wearing a blanket and holding a golf club. I was too late for this party.
nah we got kicked outta the bar after the bouncer saw us putting straws up Chelsea's nose to make her look like a walrus after she fell asleep at the table
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
By 11 pm the pants were off and there was no turning back. But on the bright side, you promised me your CDs when you died, you even signed a napkin saying so.
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
He woke me up because I was snoring and went for a second round. First time I'm happy that I snore
and then she sorta stared at me like "holy shit" and I looked down and my dog was licking her ass
Ruff night.
I feel like I had a successful night. I flashed the guy at the liquor store last night for 2 free tshirts and a giant redbull.
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