The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
Oh and my new excuse for not being able to hook up is cholera, feel free to use it
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
I'll be there soon. I expect Advil and a bucket of kittens when I arrive.
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
I don't know. What do people who don't get stoned do?
Drunkenly, I gave him a molly instead of an aleve so A) I'm still looking for him and B) I'm not sure about his headache.
Sweet! It'll be a "that-minor-I-used-to-serve-alcohol-to-is-no-longer-a-minor" party!!!
Today's goals: get day drunk then sober up in time for the walking dead tonight.
Just zoned back in to real life and found myself chanting "noodle eater noodle eater noodle eater" at my parrot as he devoured a single macaroni
I had to break up with her. She was sending me study schedules and recipes for vegan lasagna. I’m just trying to survive man
Randomize
