I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
I want my own midget army. I think I would be a good midget army leader.
Dude..TWLOHA day. gonna write LOVE on my arms before going to the bar tonight. its like a pussy guarantee.
you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it
The smiley face on that pregnancy test is so damn taunting. It's like it's laughing at me for my poor choices.
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
I already ran out of vodka but I have more beer. I just ran naked into the high school party down the street as took all theirs. ...figured no one wants to tackle the naked guy..
Dude just texted me asking if I could drive 45 mins for a quickie dude use your hand
I'm gonna try Jim's breakup remedy this weekend.
Is that the one where you drink 3 cases of beer and rewatch as much WWE RAW as you can find? Or the one where you hookup with fatties on Craigslist?
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
Bad news man, we're gonna have to reschedule Golden Coral: The Musical
I don't know who the fuck this is, but right on man
If you wake up, and some of your hair is singed off, it probably has something to do with the lit cigarette you put in your hair. You said it could double as a bobby pin...?
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