508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.
You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
My liver is crying. And I feel like I got fingered by Edward Scissorhands. While he was wearing brass knuckles
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
Last night someone asked you what your favorite color was and you said "bagel."
Dude, I work in two hours. Unless you can find Chris Hemsworth and convince him to have a three-way with us, I'm not getting out of bed.
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
I don't fucking know. He perched his parrot on his dick. I left after that.
We got stoned and took selfies with the most perfect lawn
No reason. My tongue went numb after one shot. I may die tonight
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
Randomize
