Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
Holy shit! This guy had his hands and feet handcuffed and was scooting across the interstate and we almost hit him because it was so dark. I hate Louisiana.
I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
Any coincidence your getting married tomorrow and it's the most predicted day for the rapture? Just saying
You are not about to raise that baby deer, you can BARELY raise yourself... Return it to it's mom now.
I feel bad for her, but I feel like she's one of those resource-raping alien civilizations that visits planets, decimates them and then leaves. Those really aren't the qualities I appreciate in a friend. Ya know?
Let's never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
I just gave my boss a blowjob. underneath his desk at work. that promotion is mine!
I'm sorry about the fire. I was too fucked up to do science, apparently.
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
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