this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
When I came home you were watching infomercials, eating croutons out of the box and salsa from a funnel. Well done.
You dont ever try to use your dick as a power washer to get bits of poop of the toilet bowl?
When you're on the hood of a car, 10 mph feels pretty fucking fast.
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
Would you like season tickets to my vagina?
The night is not complete until I am drnk and speaking to inanimate objects
I heard a crunch while giving him head. I looked up and he was eating Cheese Itz. So we made a deal that he'd take a hand job so I could eat them too.
I used my mad pharmacist skills to turn ordinary birth control into morning after. I think my professors would be proud.
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
just said thank you to the lady who gave me a body search at the airport
Randomize
