real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
i think the bruises are from the grocery store. on separate occasions. i've been spending a lot of time drunk at the market lately.
i have a vague recollection of being in the parking deck around 4 this morning, and on monday morning i was naked on the roof.
that would mean it's on tape
He just got home drunk. He ate 5 snack cakes, said Little Debbie's his bitch, went upstairs and fell asleep.
composition of my stomach right now: 60% C8H10N4O2 * H2O (coffee), 20% CaCO3 (pepto bismol/tums), 10% HCl (stomach acid), 5% fried rice, 5% residual adderall. i can do that by percent mass too. fuck you finals.
You were pretty dunk by the time you introduced the vase as your best friend.
Yoga may not b such a good idea for me today. My liver is obviously in cahoots with my colon to pay me back for the past 24 days of misuse . Downward dog could have catastrophic consequences.
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
5% want to drink juice and feel better, 95% just want to touch your butt
Do you remember when I didn't post that pic of you fucking an avocado on your boss' desk? Can you return the favour?
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
Things could not have gone more poorly if I had stripped naked and run through the Sahara with sirloins tied to my vagina.
I was trying to type "I just want you naked" and it put "I just want you baked"
You literally snort drugs up your nose and you’re questioning the brand of the multivitamin right now?
Randomize
