She's JV to your varsity
I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
just balanced a champagne glass on my gut. thanks to beer im a living breathing tempur-pedic mattress.
Somebody was walking their dog with their car. seriously
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
It's either my own vomit or popcorn butter in my ear right now. Banking on the second one.
We made popcorn last night. So it's both
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
I woke up with pitch black feet and crushed doritos around my mouth. That's how I determined how my night went
We're in an alley with a psychic wizard, shes reading our palms
Dont care about too tired for sex, thank you for leaving your laser pointer. I have now determined both my cats are stupid.
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