oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
I hope you have a really shitty weekend. I love you.
Is showing up wearing the condom a bit presumptus
I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
My body is being held together with whiskey, nicotine, duct tape and a little bit of hope...
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
HOW DO I ALWAS FIND THEM?! THERE WAS BE A SOCIETY OF SMALL PENISED MEN AND I MUST BELONG TO IT!
After you passed out we took your car to the campus and stole a 150lb plaque that's now in your trunk. Happy birthday!
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
How'd the date with the redheaded dentist go?
She didn't like my gingervitis joke
Randomize
