If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
Okay so if I'm going to keep referring to my hangover in the third person it needs a name.
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
She says she'll teach me how to make her squirt tonight so yea, I'm bailing again. I'm not sayin sorry since you don't have a better offer.
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
Just successfully made home fries from potatoes we used as bowls while stoned as shit. I deserve a trophy.
U know when u get really drunk and u don't think anyone can see what your doing? If I'm that drunk the possibilities are endless
Say what you want about my van, but I've got more action there than in my apartment. A body pillow and a joint still go a long way!
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
We got kicked out of yet another strip club because your mom wanted to "show these kiddies how it's done"
He was shirtless in my yard saying he was jesus
He stumbled out of their hotel room and yelled, "I'M ON A STATEWIDE TOUR. I'VE BEEN IN KENTUCKY AND OKLAHOMA."
Randomize
