I'm at the store buying plan b and vodka
the cocktail of hope
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
we went to the store to buy cookie dough and conditionally went straight towards the booze
I have the slightest memory of swinging a bag full of condoms over my head...
hungover waitressing a bar association event. im being judged by actual judges.
I woke up with a black eye, bruised knuckles, wearing women's clothing, in a house I did not recognize, next to a solid 9. Thank you for making 21 special.
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
He told me to tell my ass that he loved and missed it, and even though he hasn't known it long, it might be the one for him
He asked me if I want to play Uber Driver, is this some new sex game or is he drunk and asking for a ride home?
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
Randomize
