i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
the best things in life are free. have that freshly fucked look and doing the walk of shame by HIS girlfriend.....priceless
During sex she told me I could do anything I wanted to her. You remember that toy lightsaber we bought at Wal Mart?
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
He soundtracked our prebreakup sex, our breakup, and out postbreakup sex. At least he's dedicated.
Running into your random closeted hookup from last night is really awkward when you have to sit next to him and his girlfriend in a 200 person class.
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
Had a crazy moment last night. Had to get up, run to bathroom, pop 3 Xanax, sit on bathroom floor and rock myself in fetal position. Not my best moment.
I asked her if she could eat some Doritos so when we made out it would taste awesome
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
My idiot ex texted me on Valentine's day to tell me I was right, he did need a therapist.
I'm pretty sure I hallucinated the existence of an entire human being last night.
admittedly, geting that drunk in front of my last two exes wasnt a good idea
probably didn't help that you cheated on them with each other either
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
Randomize
