Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
I have a drunk 6th sense to lyrics of songs i dont know. It only works when i dance..
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
my mind is a poorly written porno when i'm drunk.
We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
I'm going to get so drunk tonight, I actually feel bad about the 30 seconds of drunken awkward sex I'm going to have with one lucky fat chick.
You convinced me that eggnog and rum is a great moisturizer.
I feel like I should lick our pitcher just so everyone knows its ours
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
My worst case scenario tonight is that I fuck a hot Swiss girl. Let that give you perspective on my life at the moment.
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
Hell hath no fury like a woman whose gay sidekick you insult
And now you understand the importance of Saturday naps.
Because you stay up all night having sex and eating sushi?
Randomize
