There was something that i liked about you, but you spent it
Look I'm sorry I shaved your cat, but get over it.
Literally getting boned by my flask right now. I didn't really think about this whole sneaking past security in a skin tight dress.
So I just told the bartender I would go down on her. You need to get here
the bartender cut you off himself after you started walking on tops of tables and hugging random people
i feel we're the only people who'd use nyquil sexually
GO AHEAD, BITCH, GLARE AT MY WAFFLE ONE MORE TIME. I WILL FUCK YOU UP.
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
and you fell through a lawn chair
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
Randomize
