You're completely useless in the revolution.
how can u be prego again
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
Clearly, I'm already going to hell, so there's no point in trying anymore.
Eric and I got kicked off of karaoke last night. Apparently, singing about masturbation to the tune of "A Whole New World" is not appropriate and definitely frowned upon by the DJ.
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
Woke up naked in another mans house. If that keeps happening, then I probably need to go gay. You know to make it ok.
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
Okay. How did someone manage to piss on TOP of a urinal? What giant is roaming around with a prick five feet from the ground?
I just tried to order ice cream on my bagel. I think I should just call it
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
Just woke up in a Price Chopper bathroom stall with a half eaten cake on the floor. Had to get a ride from the waitress I made out with. What happened to "Don't let me drink Tequila?"
I lied.
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
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